I Know What I Should Do If I Can't Sleep

Me:  I did something again and I think the person might think I’m a stalker.

Thomas:  What did you do?  <Sigh>

Me:  Well, you know how we won the tickets to the Ebertfest and when I opened the envelope they weren’t there and when I called the school they gave me the email of the person who was in charge and then I sent her an email asking her what I should do?

Thomas:  Yes.

Me:  Well she responded in the afternoon and then I wrote her a note back at 8:32pm asking one more question and she responded at 8:33pm.  Well this got me thinking that she must be working late to get ready for the festival and then I started worrying that she might be hungry so I sent her the following email.

“Thank you very much!  I'm imagining you are putting in a very long night getting ready for tomorrow.

I know we haven't met, but I appreciate how hard you are working to make something wonderful happen.  Would you like me to bring you something to eat or some coffee?  Chocolate?  :)  It would be my pleasure.

Krista”

Me:  She didn’t respond in a minute like she did last time.  Actually it’s been 40 minutes.  I’m all worried that she thinks I’m a stalker and she’s in her office wondering if I’m going to show up or if she should call security to walk her to her car.  You know SOME PEOPLE worry about stalkers and being all alone and people saying they are bringing pizza or subs or flowers or chocolate and really they are just going to kill them.  You know like in the Charles Bronson movie, “10 to Midnight”?  And then some how I’M going to end up naked standing in the middle of the road and Charles Bronson is going to shoot me right in the middle of the forehead.

Thomas:  You mean some people like YOU?

Me:  Maybe.  I’m going to go send her another email so she knows I’m not a stalker.

Thomas:  Not a stalker, just strange.

Time passes…..

Me:  Ok, I just sent off another email.

“hi,

my husband just reminded me that most people don't offer to bring people they don't know coffee at night.

my apologies if it made you feel uncomfortable.  that was not my intention.  i was just thinking there must be a bunch of folks working hard tonight and forgot to eat dinner or didn't have time.

therefore, i will wish you a speedy night preparing for the weekend and hope that there are coke and candy machines.  :)”

Thomas:  So basically you threw me under the bus again?

Me:  No, I made you look like the voice of reason.  Oh, hey, she just responded from my first email.

Ebertfest Lady:  “You are so kind.  I truly appreciate it.  I just got home and I hope we are ready to go!  Thanks again.”

Me:  Oh shit, now the one I just sent sounds super weird.  I’m going to send her another one so she really knows I’m not nuts.  Why, oh, why can’t we take back emails we wish we hadn’t sent?

Thomas:  You are NOT going to send her another email.  You will never meet her.  She is fine.

Me:  She just responded to my last email.

Ebertfest Lady:  “No worries!  Thanks again.”

Me:  What should I do?

Thomas:  LET IT GO!!!!!........Are you going to be able to sleep tonight?

Me:  Maybe.

Thomas:  You are so strange.

Emily:  Mom, you are REALLY, REALLY WEIRD!!!