How do you even begin to explain the love you can have for a
man?
1. He has to get your
sense of humor from the very beginning.
2. He also needs to
appreciate the little things you do for him to make him happy and comfortable.
3. He has to be patient
when you talk and talk and talk and talk.
4. He has to listen and listen and listen and listen.
5. He has to give you
his thoughts after you’ve talked and he’s listened and assure you that all is
well and everything will be ok.
6. He has to tell you
that nobody can see your flaws, unless they are standing close to you, and then
they just add character.
7. He can never hurt
you.
This is the email I received from the opthamologist when I
got home (this guy has a lot of time on his hands)…
Krista,
I was little nervous when the first thing you asked me was
if I had a sense of humor and could be talked into doing things. I do think that was funny. I don’t get many people in my exam room who
are eager to do crazy things. You kinda
scare me, but I think I like it. I think
that’s hilarious that people say that about you. I’d have to agree.
I’m glad you told me about your left armpit. Since I work from the right side it wouldn’t
be a problem. That was, however, a
little strange. Also, thank you for
telling me the trick about using anti-bacterial hand sanitizer as a quick
deodorant. That’s handy. Ha! Ha!
Ha! I do have a sense of humor. Thanks for shaving your legs, but I only work
from the neck up, so you were ok. I
apologize that it was not necessary to take your clothes off and wear the
robe. Sorry. Once again, I do only work from the neck
up. I must also apologize that we are
not a souvenir shop and didn’t have anything for your give-away. One quick question, when the nurse went back
to the room she couldn’t find the curette.
You didn’t happen to see it, did you?
I wanted to reiterate the conversation we had in the
procedure room. This is a chalazion and
at this point it has created a membrane and secured itself on the underside of
your eyelid. It will not go away, but
might change size. They tend to
fluctuate, but it will definitely be permanent.
I heard you when you said that because you had cancer you are more
vigilant about weird things that happen to your body, but I am 99.99% sure that
it is not malignant. The armpit
thing…well…that’s weird.
Once again, to the normal person your eye will look
fine. When your eyelid was pulled taut
it was much easier to see, but that position isn’t natural, so it would be
difficult for most people to notice it.
Really, the only people that look that closely at you would be your
mother and your husband and I don’t think they would mind. I will explain, once again, that I am not a
plastic surgeon and cannot give you an eyelift.
At this time, I will again recommend that we hold off on
removing the chalazion. If it starts to
hurt or impede your vision we will address the situation at that time. In the future, The Google, as you called it,
can be much scarier than real life, so watch with that in mind. I assure you that zombies are not real and
you do not have to worry about the zombie apocalypse, and no I could not see
your brain when I looked into your eye, so I don’t know if it would be
especially desirable to zombies. You ask
the most interesting questions.
I would like to thank you for saying that I am your favorite
doctor. You were by far my favorite
patient today.
Enjoy the rest of your day.
It was nice meeting you.
Sincerely,
Your Favorite Doctor
…and this is why I love this man. He is awesome!!! Thanks for your prayers, they definitely
worked. It was a bit terrifying to see
the curette and imagine it scooping out the chalazion and probably my eyeball.
I think I might keep it as a memento of my favorite doctor, instead of use it
as a give-away.
